Monkey Fist Paracord Self Defense Keychain

Ruthless Old Ladies Won’t Stand A Chance Against This Self Defense Keychain!


It is a sick, sad world we live in. It seems like these days you can’t even walk down the street without having eyes in the back of your head. Is someone following you? Is that guy gonna just suddenly attack? Is that little old lady about to pull out a little old handgun and rob you? Yes, the little old lady. Set your sights on her, because this is one situation you are going to have to strike first before you get struck. After all, she (probably) has a gun!

So you take your keys out of your pocket, and look at them as this menacing old-timer inches closer in your direction. Oh no big deal, you are just looking at your keys, right? You are just admiring how shiny they are and how cool your keychain is and BLAMMO!!! You knock that geezer out of her shoes, and you jog away after yelling “not today, you old bag!” And you have successfully escaped what could have been a fatal situation for you.

What you just hit her with, is the Monkey Fist Paracord Self Defense Keychain. This little baby is 14 feet of strong paracord, which has been woven into a 9 and a half inch tail. At the end the cord surrounds a 1 inch steel ball for whacking potential threats!

Sidenote: This thing is for self defense, please do not attack people with it.

Monkey Fist Paracord Self Defense Keychain 2

Monkey Fist Paracord Self Defense Keychain 3$12.99 From Amazon

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