Portable Pizza Pouch

Portable Pizza Pouch: What… In The Literal F*ck?!


If you are like me, you are smart, you see through the BS, and you never let anyone try to insult your intelligence by duping you into buying something worthless. Unfortunately, you are not like me. You are stupid, you have a serious case of blinders over your eyes, and you have no concept that just because you paid money for something, doesn’t make it a good idea.

And here is a product for you because you are too stupid to carry a slice of pizza. This is a portable triangular pizza pouch that you wear around your neck, and fits one slice of pizza with your choice of toppings (toppings usually cost extra)! So now you don’t have to worry about using an ounce of your brain. You don’t have to worry about messy pants, as you used to just shove your pizza in your pocket when you forgot about ziplock bags, or a lunch bag.

No word on what this thing is made of, or if it is dishwasher safe, so good luck with that. Not to mention, you will be flaunting the fact that you have food, so expect the less fortunate to hate you for wearing this… douchebag!

Portable Pizza Pouch 2

Portable Pizza Pouch 3$8 From Stupidiotic

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